I am always delighted to hear from readers; this week I was particularly excited when a local dad contacted me to share his disagreement with the recommendations put forth in the Summer issue article “Eight Sleep Tips for A Every Child” by Elizabeth Pantley. If you haven’t had a chance to read the article yet, take a boo at it on page 8. You can find a copy online here.

When Tom contacted me, he included the following piece he wrote in response to a similar type sleep article that recently ran in the Western News in Penticton, BC.

Although his response addresses some content the Pantley article in the Summer issue does not cover, his words nicely summarize his perspective on handling bedtime.

Here’s my take: There are two key elements that influence our parenting style, no matter the domain. First, each of us has our own philosophies, beliefs and values that guide our behaviors. No two individuals parent the same, nor should they. Second, the extent to which our actual parenting maps on to our ideal intentions is influenced by the temperament of our child. In a way, parenting is a bit of a dance between adult and child, where we move at slightly different rhythms at different times. It’s up to the parent to choose the music but we can always see how our child(ren) respond to one type of music versus another.

Ultimately, we go with what feels right to us, what makes the most sense to us. It doesn’t make an approach another parent employs wrong, just different. A discrepant approach might feel wrong, but I think it’s important that we remember there’s a difference between another approach  feeling wrong and taking another step to then judge it as wrong. We’re all just simply different and that diversity is a good thing. We can learn so much if we’re open to listening and entertaining the ideas and thoughts of others. I am always a strong advocate that all of us parents need to act in ways that will keep us the happiest and healthiest we can be. This in turn means having the resources available to respond with greater sensitivity and patience to our child(ren). How the parenting looks will vary and what feels right to any given parent will vary. And that’s OK.

Please tell us…how do you handle naptimes and bedtimes in your house?! What works best for you and your little ones?!